Poemspiracy

With star studded eyes
and telescopes, you know,
Most wished they could go there,
others decided to go.

In secret they planned,
then took to the skies.
Projects secret and black
caused funds to arise.

A space Corps so hush hush,
Funneled funding immense.
Reverse engineered spacecraft
Left earth's field so intense.

First the moon and then Mars,
the black projects built camps.
With Hubble rightly pointed,
on our moon we see ramps!

We have gone far beyond that,
met alien species, too.
While here on this earth,
lawmakers haven't a clue.

So let's trust those wise ones
who make decisions of such gravities.
Because if we do speak against them,
our heads all might get cavities.

--E.R. Wallace, Ph.D.

Neteller Fiasco Nearing Its End

After a six month episode, the funds that were being held hostage by Neteller can now be requested for those residing in the USA . No apologies have been forthcoming up to this point, and I wouldn't expect one given the tight lipped handling of this whole scenario. We have all learned a valuable lesson from all of this: 'Our money isn't really ours afterall if the Department of Defense decides it pertains to national security in some twisted way.' Whatever. I look both ways before I fart anymore. Technically, that could be considered a WMD nerve agent.

Debunking Conspiracy Theorists By Gerard Holmgren, 2003-02-15

Astute observers of history are aware that for every notable event there will usually be at least one, often several, wild conspiracy theories which spring up around it. "The CIA killed Hendrix", "The Pope had John Lennon murdered ", "Hitler was half Werewolf", "Space aliens replaced Nixon with a clone", etc, etc. The bigger the event, the more ridiculous and more numerous are the fanciful rantings which circulate in relation to it.

So it's hardly surprising that the events of Sept 11 2001 have spawned their fair share of these ludicrous fairy tales. And as always, there is sadly a small but gullible percentage of the population eager to lap up these tall tales, regardless of facts or rational analysis.

One of the wilder stories circulating about Sept 11, and one that has attracted something of a cult following amongst conspiracy buffs is that it was carried out by 19 fanatical Arab hijackers, masterminded by an evil genius named Osama bin Laden, with no apparent motivation other than that they "hate our freedoms."

Never a group of people to be bothered by facts, the perpetrators of this cartoon fantasy have constructed an elaborately woven web of delusions and unsubstantiated hearsay in order to promote this garbage across the internet and the media to the extent that a number of otherwise rational people have actually fallen under its spell. Normally I don't even bother debunking this kind of junk, but the effect that this paranoid myth is beginning to have requires a little rational analysis, in order to consign it to the same rubbish bin as all such silly conspiracy theories.

These crackpots even contend that the extremist Bush regime was caught unawares by the attacks, had no hand in organizing them, and actually would have stopped them if it had been able. Blindly ignoring the stand-down of the US Air Force, the insider trading on airline stocks — linked to the CIA, the complicit behavior of Bush on the morning of the attacks, the controlled demolition of the WTC, the firing of a missile into the Pentagon and a host of other documented proofs that the Bush regime was behind the attacks, the conspiracy theorists stick doggedly to a silly story about 19 Arab hijackers somehow managing to commandeer 4 planes simultaneously and fly them around US airspace for nearly 2 hours, crashing them into important buildings, without the US intelligence services having any idea that it was coming, and without the Air Force knowing what to do.

The huge difficulties with such a stupid story force them to invent even more preposturous stories to distract from its core silliness, and thus the tale has escalated into a mythic fantasy of truly gargantuan proportions.

It's difficult to apply rational analysis to such unmitigated stupidity, but that is the task which I take on in this article. However, it should be noted that one of the curious characteristics of conspiracy theorists is that they effortlessly change their so-called evidence in response to each aspect which is debunked. As soon as one delusion is unmasked, they simply invent another to replace it, and deny that the first ever existed. Eventually, when they have turned full circle through this endlessly changing fantasy fog , they then re-invent the original delusion and deny that you ever debunked it, thus beginning the circle once more. This technique is known as "the fruit loop" and saves the conspiracy theorist from ever having to see any of their ideas through to their (ill)logical conclusions.

According to the practitioners of the fruit loop, 19 Arabs took over the 4 planes by subduing the passengers and crew through the use of guns, knives, box cutters and gas, and then used electronic guidance systems which they had smuggled on board to fly the planes to their targets.

The suspension of disbelief required for this outrageous concoction is only for the hard-core conspiracy theorist. For a start, they conveniently skip over the awkward fact that there weren't any Arabs on the planes. If there were, one must speculate that they somehow got on board without being filmed by any of the security cameras and without being registered on the passenger lists. But the curly question of how they are supposed to have got on board is all too mundane for the exciting world of the conspiracy theorist. With vague mumblings that they must have been using false ID (but never specifying which IDs they are alleged to have used, or how these were traced to their real identities), they quickly bypass this problem, to relate exciting and sinister tales about how some of the fictitious fiends were actually searched before boarding because they looked suspicious. However, as inevitably happens with any web of lies, this simply paints them into an even more difficult corner. How are they supposed to have got on board with all that stuff if they were searched? And if they used gas in a confined space, they would have been affected themselves unless they also had masks in their luggage.

"Excuse me sir, why do you have a boxcutter, a gun, a container of gas, a gas mask and an electronic guidance unit in your luggage?" "A present for your grandmother? Very well sir, on you get." "Very strange", thinks the security officer. "That's the fourth Arab man without an Arabic name who just got on board with a knife, gun or boxcutter and gas mask. And why does that security camera keep flicking off every time one of these characters shows up? Must be one of those days I guess..."

Asking any of these basic questions to a conspiracy theorist is likely to cause a sudden leap to the claim that we know that they were on board because they left a credit card trail for the tickets they had purchased and cars they had rented. So if they used credit cards that identified them, how does that reconcile with the claim that they used false IDs to get on to the plane? But by this time the fruit loop is in full swing, as the conspiracy theorist tries to stay one jump ahead of this annoying and awkward rational analysis. They will allege that the hijackers' passports were found at the crash scenes. "So there!" they exalt triumphantly, their fanatical faces lighting up with that deranged look of one who has just a revelation of questionable sanity. Hmm? So they got on board with false IDs but took their real passports with them? However, by this time the fruit loop has been completely circumnavigated,and the conspiracy theorist exclaims impatiently, "Who said anything about false IDs? We know what seats they were sitting in! Their presence is well documented!" And so the whole loop starts again. "Well, why aren't they on the passenger lists?" "You numbskull! They assumed the identities of other passengers!" And so on...

Finally, out of sheer fascination with this circular method of creative delusion, the rational sceptic will allow them to get away with this loop, in order to move on to the next question, and see what further delights await us in the unraveling of this marvelously stupid story. "Uh, how come their passports survived fiery crashes that completely incinerated the planes and all the passengers? " The answer of course is that it's just one of those strange co-incidences, those little quirks of fate that do happen from time to time. You know, like the same person winning the lottery four weeks in a row. The odds are astronomical, but these things do happen...

This is another favourite deductive method of the conspiracy theorist. The "improbability drive", in which they decide upon a conclusion without any evidence whatsoever to support it, and then continually speculate a series of wildly improbable events and unbelievable co-incidences to support it, shrugging off the implausibility of each event with the vague assertion that sometimes the impossible happens (just about all the time in their world). There is a principle called "Occam's Razor" which suggests that in the absence of evidence to the contrary, the simplest explanation is most likely to be correct. Conspiracy theorists hate Occam's razor.

Having for the sake of amusement, allowed them to get away with with the silly story of the 19 invisible Arabs, we move on to the question of how they are supposed to have taken over the planes. Hijacking a plane is not an easy thing to do. Hijacking it without the pilot being able to alert ground control is nearly impossible. The pilot has only to punch in a four-digit code to alert ground control to a hijacking. Unconcerned with the awkward question of plausibility, the conspiracy buffs maintain that on that Sept 11, the invisible hijackers took over the plane by the rather crude method of threatening people with boxcutters and knives, and spraying gas (after they had attached their masks, obviously), but somehow took control of the plane without the crew first getting a chance to punch in the hijacking code. Not just on one plane, but on all four. At this point in the tale, the conspiracy theorist is again forced to call upon the services of the improbability drive.

So now that our incredibly lucky hijackers have taken control of the planes, all four pilots fly them with breath-taking skill and certainty to their fiery end, all four pilots unflinching in their steely resolve for a swift meeting with Allah. Apart from their psychotic hatred of "our freedoms", it was their fanatical devotion to Islam which enabled them to summon up the iron will to do this. Which is strange, because according to another piece of hearsay peddled by the conspiracy buffs, these guys actually went out drinking and womanizing the night before their great martyrdom, even leaving their Korans in the bar — really impeccable Islamic behavior — and then got up at 5 am the next morning to pull off the greatest covert operation in history. This also requires us to believe that they were even clear-headed enough to learn how to fly the huge planes by reading flight manuals in Arabic in the car on the way to the airport. We know this because they supposedly left the flight manuals there for us to find.

It gets better. Their practical training had allegedly been limited to Cessnas and flight simulators, but this was no barrier to the unflinching certainty with which they took over the planes and skillfully guided them to their doom. If they are supposed to have done their flight training with these tools, which would be available just about anywhere in the world, it's not clear why they would have decided to risk blowing their cover to US intelligence services by doing the training in Florida, rather than somewhere in the Middle East, but such reasoning is foreign to the foggy world of the conspiracy theorist, too trapped in the constant rotation of the mental fruit loop to make their unsubstantiated fabrications seem even semi-believable.

Having triumphantly established a circular delusion in support of the mythical Arabs, the conspiracy theorist now confronts the difficult question of why there's nothing left of the planes. Anybody who has seen the endlessly-replayed footage of the second plane going into the WTC will realize that the plane was packed with explosives. Planes do not and cannot blow up into nothing in that manner when they crash.

Did the mythical Arabs also haul a huge heap of explosives on board, and manage to deploy them in such a manner that they went off in the exact instant of the crash, completely vapourizing the plane? This is a little difficult even for the conspiracy theorist, who at this point decides that it's easier to invent new laws of physics in order to keep the delusion rolling along.

There weren't any explosives. It wasn't an inside job. The plane blew up into nothing from its exploding fuel load! Remarkable! Sluggishly combustible jet fuel which is basically kerosine,and which burns at a maximum temperature of around 800°C has suddenly taken on the qualities of a ferociously explosive demolition agent, vapourizing 65 tons of aircraft into a puff of smoke. Never mind that a plane of that size contains around 15 tons of steel and titanium, of which even the melting points are about double that of the maximum combustion temperature of kerosine — let alone the boiling point — which is what would be required to vapourize a plane. And then there's about 50 tons of aluminium to be accounted for. In excess of 15 lbs of metal for each gallon of kerosine.

For the conspiracy theorist, such inconvenient facts are vaguely dismissed as "mumbo jumbo". This convenient little phrase is their answer to just about anything factual or logical. Like a conjurer pulling a rabbit out of a hat, they suddenly become fanatically insistent about the devastating explosive qualities of kerosine, something hitherto completely unknown to science, but just discovered by them, this very minute. Blissfully ignoring the fact that never before or since in aviation history has a plane vapourized into nothing from an exploding fuel load, the conspiracy theorist relies upon Hollywood images, where the effects are are always larger than life, and certainly larger than the intellects of these cretins. "Its a well known fact that planes blow up into nothing on impact." they state with pompous certainty. "Watch any Bruce Willis movie." Care to provide any documented examples? If it's a well-known fact, then presumably this well-known fact springs from some kind of documentation — other than Bruce Willis movies?

At this point the mad but cunning eyes of the conspiracy theorist will narrow as they sense the corner that they have backed themselves into, and plan their escape by means of another stunning backflip.
"Ah, but planes have never crashed into buildings before, so there's no way of telling." they counter with a sly grin.
Well, actually planes have crashed into buildings before and since, and not vapourized into nothing.
"But not big planes, with that much fuel ", they shriek in hysterical denial. Or that much metal to vapourize.
"Yes but not hijacked planes!"
Are you suggesting that whether the crash is deliberate or accidental affects the combustion qualities of the fuel?
"Now you're just being silly".

Although collisions with buildings are rare, planes frequently crash into mountains, streets, other aircraft, nosedive into the ground, or have bombs planted aboard them, and don't vapourize into nothing. What's so special about a tower that's mostly glass? But by now, the conspiracy theorist has once again sailed happily around the fruit loop. "Its a well-documented fact that planes explode into nothing on impact."

Effortlessly weaving back and forth between the position that it's a "well-known fact" and that "it's never happened before, so we have nothing to compare it to", the conspiracy theorist has now convinced himself (if not too many other people) that the WTC plane was not loaded with explosives, and that the instant vapourization of the plane in a massive fireball was the same as any other plane crash you might care to mention. Round and round the fruit loop...

But the hurdles which confront the conspiracy theorist are many, and they are now forced to implement even more creative uses for the newly-discovered shockingly destructive qualities of kerosine. They have to explain how the Arabs also engineered the elegant vertical collapse of both the WTC towers, and for this awkward fact the easiest counter is to simply deny that it was a controlled demolition, and claim that the buildings collapsed from fire caused by the burning kerosine.

For this, it's necessary to sweep aside the second law of thermodynamics and propose kerosine which is not only impossibly destructive, but also recycles itself for a second burning in violation of the law of degradation of energy. You see, the kerosine not only consumed itself in a sudden catastrophic fireball, vapourizing a 65 ton plane into nothing, but then came back for a second go, burning at 2000°C for another hour at the impact point, melting the skyscraper's steel like butter. And while it was doing all this it also poured down the elevator shafts, starting fires all through the building. When I was at school there was a little thing called the entropy law which suggests that a given portion of fuel can only burn once, something which is readily observable in the real world, even for those who didn't make it to junior high school science. But this is no problem for the conspiracy theorist. Gleefully, they claim that a few thousand gallons of kerosine is enough to:

• completely vapourize a 65 ton aircraft
• have enough left over to burn ferociously enough for over an hour at the impact point to melt steel (melting point about double the maximum combustion temperature of the fuel) and
• still have enough left over to pour down the elevator shafts and start similarly destructive fires all through the building.

This kerosine really is remarkable stuff! How chilling to realize that those kerosine heaters we had in the house when I was a kid were deadly bombs, just waiting to go off. One false move and the entire street might have been vapourized. And never again will I take kerosine lamps out camping. One moment you're there innocently holding the lamp — the next — kapow! vapourized into nothing along with with the rest of the camp site, and still leaving enough of the deadly stuff to start a massive forest fire.

These whackos are actually claiming that the raging inferno allegedly created by the miraculously recycling, and impossibly hot burning kerosine melted or at least softened the steel supports of the skyscraper. Oblivious to the fact that the smoke coming from the WTC was black, which indicates an oxygen-starved fire — therefore, not particularly hot, they trumpet an alleged temperature in the building of 2000°C, without a shred of evidence to support this curious suspension of the laws of physics.

Not content with this ludicrous garbage, they then contend that as the steel frames softened, they came straight down instead of buckling and twisting and falling sideways.

Since they've already re-engineered the combustion qualities of jet fuel, violated the second law of thermodynamics, and re-defined the structural properties of steel, why let a little thing like the laws of gravity get in the way?

The tower fell in a time almost identical to that of a free-falling object, dropped from that height, meaning that it's physically impossible for it to have collapsed by the method of the top floors smashing through the lower floors. But according to the conspiracy theorists, the laws of gravity were temporarily suspended on the morning of Sept 11. It appears that the evil psychic power of those dreadful Arabs knew no bounds. Even after they were dead, they were able, by the power of their evil spirits, to force down the tower at a speed physically impossible under the laws of gravity, had it been meeting any resistance from fireproofed steel structures originally designed to resist many tons of hurricane force wind as well as the impact of a Boeing passenger jet straying off course.

Clearly, these conspiracy nuts never did their science homework at school, but did become extremely adept at inventing tall tales for why.
"Muslim terrorists stole my notes, sir"
"No miss, the kerosine heater blew up and vapourized everything in the street, except for my passport."
"You see sir, the schoolbus was hijacked by Arabs who destroyed my homework because they hate our freedoms."
Or perhaps they misunderstood the term "creative science" and mistakenly thought that coming up with such rubbish was, in fact, their science homework.

The ferocious heat generated by this ghastly kerosine was, according to the conspiracy theorists, the reason why so many of the WTC victims can't be identified. DNA is destroyed by heat. (Although 2000°C isn't really required, 100°C will generally do the job.) This is quite remarkable, because according to the conspiracy theorist, the nature of DNA suddenly changes if you go to a different city. That's right! If you are killed by an Arab terrorist in New York, your DNA will be destroyed by such temperatures. But if you are killed by an Arab terrorist in Washington DC, your DNA will be so robust that it can survive temperatures which completely vapourize a 65 ton aircraft.

You see, these loonies have somehow concocted the idea that the missile which hit the pentagon was not a missile at all, but one of the hijacked planes. And to prove this unlikely premise, they point to a propaganda statement from the Bush regime, which rather stupidly claims that all but one of the people aboard the plane were identified from the site by DNA testing, even though nothing remains of the plane. The plane was vapourized by the fuel tank explosion maintain these space loonies, but the people inside it were all but one identified by DNA testing.

So there we have it. The qualities of DNA are different, depending upon which city you're in, or perhaps depending upon which fairy story you're trying to sell at any particular time.

This concoction about one of the hijacked planes hitting the Pentagon really is a howler. For those not familiar with the layout of the Pentagon, it consists of 5 rings of building, each with a space inbetween. Each ring of building is about 30 to 35 ft deep, with a similar amount of open space between it and the next ring. The object which penetrated the Pentagon went in at about a 45-degree angle, punching a neat circular hole of about a 12-foot diameter through three rings (six walls). A little later a section of wall about 65 ft wide collapsed in the outer ring. Since the plane which the conspiracy theorists claim to be responsible for the impact had a wing span of 125 ft and a length of 155 ft, and there was no wreckage of the plane, either inside or outside the building, and the lawns outside were still smooth and green enough to play golf on, this crazy delusion is clearly physically impossible.

But hey, we've already disregarded the combustion qualities of jet fuel, the normal properties of common building materials, the properties of DNA, the laws of gravity and the second law of thermodynamics, so what the hell — why not throw in a little spatial impossibility as well? I would have thought that the observation that a solid object cannot pass through another solid object without leaving a hole at least as big as itself is reasonably sound science. But to the conspiracy theorist, this is "mumbo jumbo". It conflicts with the delusion that they're hooked on, so it "must be wrong" although trying to get then to explain exactly how it could be wrong is a futile endeavour.

Conspiracy theorists fly into a curious panic whenever the Pentagon missile is mentioned. They nervously maintain that the plane was vapourized by it's exploding fuel load and point to the WTC crash as evidence of this behavior. (That's a wonderful fruit loop.) Like an insect which has just been sprayed, running back and forth in its last mad death throes, they first argue that the reason the hole is so small is that plane never entered the wall, having blown up outside, and then suddenly backflip to explain the 250 ft deep missile hole by saying that the plane disappeared all the way into the building, and then blew up inside the building (even though the building shows no sign of such damage). As for what happened to the wings — here's where they get really creative. The wings snapped off and folded into the fuselage which then carried them into the building, which then closed up behind the plane like a piece of meat.

When it suits them, they'll also claim that the plane slid in on its belly (ignoring the undamaged lawn) while at the same time citing alleged witnesses to the plane diving steeply into the building from an "irrecoverable angle." How they reconcile these two scenarios as being compatible is truly a study in stupidity.

Once they get desperate enough, you can be sure that the UFO conspiracy stuff will make an appearance. The Arabs are in league with the Martians. Space aliens snatched the remains of the Pentagon plane and fixed most of the hole in the wall, just to confuse people. They gave the Arabs invisibility pills to help get them onto the planes. Little green men were seen were seen talking to Bin Laden a few weeks prior to the attacks.

As the nation gears up to impeach the traitor Bush, and stop his perpetual oil war, it's not helpful to have these idiots distracting from the process by spreading silly conspiracy theories about mythical Arabs, stories which do nothing but play into the hands of the extremist Bush regime.

At a less serious time, we might tolerate such crackpots with amused detachment, but they need to understand that the treachery that was perpetrated on Sept 11, and the subsequent war crimes committed in "retaliation", are far too serious for us to allow such frivolous self-indulgence to go unchallenged.

Those who are truly addicted to conspiracy delusions should find a more appropriate outlet for their paranoia. It's time to stop loony conspiracy theories about Sept 11.

---

Copyright 2003 Gerard Holmgren

WTO Revelation: USA Preaching, But Not Practicing

(Source: The Associated Press)

The US has failed to change its ban on internet betting to comply with a World Trade Organisation ruling that said the legislation unfairly targets offshore casinos.

The ruling opens the door to possible commercial sanctions against the US. In a 215-page decision, a three-member WTO compliance panel sided with the twin Caribbean island nation of Antigua and Barbuda, which has argued that internet gambling is a lucrative source of revenue and provides an income for hundreds of islanders.

The Geneva-based trade referee has said Washington can maintain restrictions on online gambling, as long as its laws are equally applied to American operators offering remote betting on horse racing. "It vindicates all that we have been saying for years about the discriminatory trade practices of the United States in this area, and we look forward to the United States opening its markets," Antiguan Finance Minister Errol Cort said in a statement.

Washington claimed victory in the WTO's initial ruling two years ago because the body recognised its right to prevent offshore betting as a means of protecting public order and public morals. But the US acknowledged on Friday that the latest decision was a setback.

"The compliance panel did not agree with the United States that we had taken the necessary steps to comply with the WTO recommendations," said Gretchen Hamel, a spokeswoman for the office of the US Trade Representative. She said, however, that "nothing in the panel's report undermines the broad, favourable results that the United States obtained from the WTO in April 2005."

Washington still has yet to say if it will appeal the compliance panel's findings. A final ruling upholding Antigua's claims would allow the twin-island nation to seek trade sanctions on the United States for its failure to comply. To avoid the penalties, the US government would then have to either permit Americans to gamble over foreign-based sites or eliminate exceptions for off-track betting on horses, including over the internet, as permitted under the 1978 Interstate Horseracing Act.

Nevertheless, it appears unlikely that the US will ease access to companies with servers licensed in the nation of 80,000 people - whose legal efforts were largely bankrolled by British internet gambling operators. The US Congress caught the industry by surprise last year when it added a provision to a bill aimed at improving port security that would make it illegal for banks and credit card companies to settle payments to online gambling sites. US President George W Bush signed it into law on October 14.

The decision closed off the most lucrative region in a market worth $US15.5 billion ($19.1 billion) last year. Several British internet gaming companies and a handful in Europe and Australia subsequently sold off or shut down their US operations, losing around 80 per cent of their combined business in the process. The arrest last year of two British internet gambling executives while traveling through the United States also highlighted the US government's escalation in its battle against the industry.

Peter Dicks, the former chairman of Sportingbet, was detained in New York but released after former New York Governor George Pataki declined to sign a warrant extraditing him to Louisiana, where he was wanted on charges of illegal online gambling. Former BetOnSports chief executive officer David Carruthers remains under house arrest in the St. Louis area awaiting trial on federal charges from the US attorney's office based on the 1961 Wire Act.

Antigua filed its case in 2003, contending that US restrictions on internet gambling violated trade commitments the United States made as a member of the WTO. US trade officials disagreed, saying that negotiators involved in the Uruguay Round of global trade talks clearly intended to exclude gambling.

Antiguan authorities also argued that restrictions barring US residents from betting at offshore casinos were harming efforts to diversify its economy. Antigua, a former British colony in the Caribbean, had been promoting electronic commerce as a way to end the country's reliance on tourism, which was hurt by a series of hurricanes in the late 1990s. There are 32 licensed online casinos in Antigua, employing 1000 people and generating yearly revenue of around $US130 million. Seven years ago, its casinos had annual income closer to $US1 billion.

Antigua is the smallest country to successfully litigate a case in the WTO's 12-year history.

Next Victim: Neteller

Add another company to the 'not a front for the CIA' list. Neteller apparently was not contributing enough cash to the self-serving U.S. government. In yet another of a series of gustapo-esque moves, the original founders of Neteller were apprehended in separate U.S. airports simultaneously this week. Neteller reacted quickly by first disabling 'instacash' purchases for U.S. accounts. This was promptly followed by the inevitable announcement that Neteller could no longer be used to fund any type of online gambling.

Alternative methods must now be considered, as most online gamers utilized Neteller for their funding option. Pre-paid credit cards might be the beneficiaries. One has to wonder if all of the recent attention to online funding methods is due to large monetary 'contributions' made by credit card companies to our faithful lawmakers. Any way one chooses to look at it, something is definately rotten in Denmark.

We should all pay close attention to what parties profit the most from these recent changes. The money trail should be fairly easy to trace back to the true culprits. I can only hope that every effort will be made to circumvent these crooks with new funding options that fall within the parameters of our ever-changing interpretation of U.S. law.

Final BPT Tourney: Pure Chaos!

Poker.com hosted the sophomore season finale of the Blogger Poker Tour last weekend. The top twenty bloggers from the season standings squared off for a staggering $25,000 in prizes. This may well be the best opportunity on the internet to win an entry into The Aussie Millions, including the $10,000 entry fee & $2500 spending cash! A 1 in 20 chance for the big prize had everybody a bit antsy, and tension was high.

The early going was dominated by what you might call 'posturing'. Well, nobody wanted to be the first one out I guess. The full field was still intact after the first break, but not for long. Some of the big guns were the first to go. Once they started falling, they dropped like flies. I did manage to make the final table as the short stack, however. After a good run of cards and a lot of luck, I clawed my way out of the hole. natsdad became the next casualty and then there were nine.

Veteran JayNYC was next, followed quickly by season strong man ViezeMan in eighth place. Then, yours truly bit the dust in a bit of a bad beat to chip leader freeroll26. So I snagged seventh place and a Poker.com ipod Nano, which was a nice consolation prize to say the least. That's when PureChaos turned up the heat my friends. He didn't look back until he had defeated Evil666 heads-up to win the BPT Final and the $12,500 Prize Package. ZowieZ wound up third, with IronGirl, Freeroll26, and 2nd Grand Prize Winner Imjusthere4thebeer (Woohoo Congrats!!) rounding out the top six.

Congratulations to all the competitors as the entire season was very competitive indeed! Let's all keep an eye on the Aussie Millions and get behind Jerry, aka PureChaos. Many thanks to Poker.com for another successful Blogger Poker Tour season! Here are the final results and prizes:

01. PureChaos ($12,500 Prize Package)
02. Evil666 (8' BPT Poker Table)
03. ZowieZ (6' BPT Poker Table)
04. Ironirl (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
05. Freeroll26 (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
06. Imjusthere4thebeer (ipod Nano & Aussie Millions Trip)
07. brodoughno (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
08. ViezeMan (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
09. JayNYC (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
10. natsdad (Poker.com 4GB ipod Nano)
11. EgonOlsen (Poker.com Chip Set)
12. astinaguy (Poker.com Chip Set)
13. kufolem (Poker.com Chip Set)
14. cerberi (Poker.com Chip Set)
15. skinski (Poker.com Chip Set)
16. Hacksaw2000 (Poker.com Grand Final Ticket)
17. DawgRoyal (Poker.com Grand Final Ticket)
18. OhioMike (Poker.com Grand Final Ticket)
19. PearlSnapMan (Poker.com Grand Final Ticket)
20. iyatoni (Poker.com Grand Final Ticket)

Amazing Prediction!! ignorant_ape flames Skyway

This will occur at 6:12PM EST (+ or - 5 hours) on 01/06/07 at Above Top Secret in the thread 'The object was NOT a Russian rocket!!' (in the Conspiracy Forum Group)

His post will look something like this:

"stop lying , you blistering troll

NASA predicted this , get over it and read the chuffing story

why are you being so delibertly dishonest ???"


Happy New Year!

BPT $25,000 Final: Field of 20 Determined

The Blogger Poker Tour is concluding its second season at Poker.com. Still to come is the $25,000 final tournament which will feature the top 20 point-getters from the seven qualifying events. The seventh of those tournies was held this past Saturday at Poker.com. The outcome proved very pivotal in the overall standings, characterized by a few make or break scenarios for a handful of hopefuls. I (brodoughno) determined my best option was to sit the event out, to avoid any potential early elimination. My decision turned out to be the correct one, and I easily qualified into the final. Had I played and finished near last place, I likely would not have finished in the top 20. There appears to be a couple of others who might have been better served employing the same strategy. The possibilities were seemingly endless and only the top ten were guaranteed a spot in the final regardless of the outcome of BPT event #7. Congrats to all the qualifiers! The final standings will be posted shortly.

One More Qualifier Left For BPT

New names were the order of the day in BPT event #6 at Poker.com Saturday. The host blog was Flopilicious, and the overall standing continue to do belly flops. Here are your results and standings as we near the $25,000 final.

1	Flandrius	$125.00
2	Lauradm	$100.00
3	Evil666	$75.00
4	XaqNautilus	$55.00
5	kdollar00	$45.00
6	bolcs5	$30.00
7	JayNYC	$25.00
8	Bardiya	$20.00
9	PearlSnapMan	$15.00
10	ViezeMan	$10.00

Overall /Player & Blog/BPT #6 Result/Total Points
(01) skinski Skinski's Blog (40) 1095
(02) irongirl Irongirl01 (25) 827
(03) ViezeMan Peetscheet (10) 783
(04) Flopilicious Flopilicious (53) 714
(05) freeroll26 Freerollcalendar Weblog (86) 689
(06) imjusthere4thebeer Poker Pub (42) 681
(07) kufolem Poker Athletes Blog (30) 659
(08) iyatoni Perfectly Beastly (72) 658
(09) JayNYC I hate money (07) 624
(10) astinaguy astinaguys poker blog (34) 617
(11) natsdad Alex (36) 597
(12) DawgRoyal Royal Poker (67) 588
(13) brodoughno Gamingology (70) 578
(14) PearlSnapMan PearlSnapMan Plays Poker (03) 536
(15) ReplicantPoker ReplicantPoker blog (123) 484
(16) cerberi riverdemon (38) 482
(18) elc3105 elc3105s blog (104) 459
(20) Hacksaw2000 5TH Street Forum (91) 445

BPT Event #5: Shorthanded & Action Packed

Skinski's The House of Blues hosted the festivities this week as we turned the corner of the Blogger Poker Tour's sophomore season at poker.com. This, the fifth of seven preliminary events, was a shorthanded version of no-limit texas holdem. With a maximum of six players per table, this format forces a more aggressive style of play and is extremely fast paced.

Marckster1 quickly jumped out to a healthy chip advantage and among his victims was last week's winner kufolem. TheBigSurprise, one of twenty new bloggers on the BPT this week, lived up to the name and also showed strength out of the gate. The attrition rate was high, and the first hour of play saw the field of 116 reduced by more than half, but some familiar names were climbing up the leaderboard. Holding chipstacks of around 9,000 each, 4th place JayNYC, 5th DawgRoyal, and 6th ViezeMan were stalking leader Marckster1's 14,570 chips. Also worth noting is the determination shown by last week's runner-up imjusthere4thebeer, who found trouble immediately this go around. Nursing only the remnants of his crippled stack, he made a 'Smokey & The Bandit' magnitude beer run, eventually finishing 19th.

When play resumed after the first break, the last surviving sitout was at my table and was much like a hurricane tested trick candle. A weapon was required to finally knock them out- Uzzzzi, who was rising to power along with luckylolo at the expense of Marckster1. This is about the time that your correspondent, brodoughno, took it on the chin. I had progressed to 10th place before river cards sunk my hopes in consecutive hands. First, my suited AK was outdone by A2 when Marckster1 caught a deuce on the river for half my chips. Then moments later, I pushed with QQ and succumbed to Uzzzzi's AK when a king floated in at the last moment to eliminate your bro in 31st spot.

At almost the same instant, TheBigSurprise, DawgRoyal and Irongirl had gone out in 32nd, 34th and 35th repectively. Then I took a phone call from the Associated Press, who of course wanted an update on the action. After checking the Michigan/OSU game I looked back and had missed the final table altogether. Event #2 bridesmaid iyatoni evidently took control when it counted and edged out event host and new BPT leader skinski. Poker.com mainstay JayNYC, who seemed like the favorite at the time I went out of the tourney, came home in 3rd place and is in good shape to make the finals despite missing the first two events. Event #4 winner freeroll26 notched a re-enforcing 4th place finish, and event #1 champ ReplicantPoker made another final table before finishing 10th. Congrats to all the winners this week and I want to wish the entire BPT a Happy Thanksgiving. The tour will resume Dec. 2, giving everyone plenty of time to sleep off that Turkey. Listed below are the updated BPT standings.


Overall /Player & Blog/BPT #5 Result/Total Points
(01) skinski Skinski's Blog (02) 1002
(02) irongirl Irongirl01 (35) 719
(03) freeroll26 Freerollcalendar Weblog (04) 642
(04) ViezeMan Peetscheet (20) 598
(05) iyatoni Perfectly Beastly (01) 597
(06) kufolem Poker Athletes Blog (67) 556
(07) imjusthere4thebeer Poker Pub (19) 550
(08) DawgRoyal Royal Poker (34) 522
(09) astinaguy astinaguys poker blog (08) 518
(10) brodoughno Gamingology (31) 515
(11) natsdad Alex (27) 500
(12) ReplicantPoker ReplicantPoker blog (10) 474
(13) elc3105 elc3105s blog (47) 430
(14) JayNYC I hate money (03) 415
(15) DavidMalek 11ave.blogspot.com (80) 411
(16) Hacksaw2000 5TH Street Forum (54) 403
(17) cerberi riverdemon (07) 387
(18) gohabs1234 free poker (30) 363
(19) PearlSnapMan PearlSnapMan Plays Poker (21) 350
(20) MTLdon the life of a don (77) 346

Online Poker: Betting Patterns To Watch For

• Bet size - many online players make smaller continuation bets (+/- 30% of the pot) when they miss the flop. This sometimes can be deceptive because some players will frequently do this when they flop a monster. They will also fluctuate bet size with the strength of their hand before the flop. Usually, smaller bets mean weaker hands. When you are in the blinds, beware of a small raise from the button when it is folded around. Many times this indicates a strong hand.
  

• Continuation bets: does a player frequently make a bet after the flop? Many players that make continuation bets will check the flop when they hit a monster. A check from an aggressive player on the flop usually indicates a monster.
  

• Players that check/call out of position on the flop that bet out the turn usually have a strong hand.
  

• A player first to act that check/calls on the flop and the turn and bets the river almost always has a big hand.
  

• A player that min bets the flop is nearly always on a draw. It is a defensive bet to keep other players from betting out.
  

• A minimum reraise (example: you raise to 100, he makes it 200) before the flop usually means a aces or kings. They are building the pot, looking for action.
  

• Raises that are larger than usual (6-7 BB for example) usually mean a medium pair or Ace/King.
  

• Strong players that just call large bets after the flop have either big hands or big draws (flush draws + 2 over cards, straight flush draws, etc). Strong players will either bet/raise or fold. They typically won't play draws unless they have the odds to do so.

• If someone does something consistently and suddenly alters their play, it's almost always a sign of strength.

• The min re-raise preflop is almost always AA/KK. The limp re-raise is almost always AA/KK.

• In short, look for bets/raises/calls that are unusual - too big or too small - or just simply out of character.

BPT Event #4: Omaha a Go-Go Shakes Up Standings

Irongirl played host to the fourth installment of the Blogger Poker Tour Saturday at Poker.com. This event was billed as Omaha a Go-Go, which conjured up images of Goldie Hawn in a tight mini-skirt and high-heeled white boots doing "the watusi". My mind drifted to a happier time and I barely noticed the seating configutration.

The true nature of this pot limit tournament had become apparent, as there were only eight players per table. The blinds loomed large and play was very aggressive right from the start. Don't you love it when you're dealt AsAdKsKd, everybody calls your raise, and the flop comes 567 rainbow? Or you're in the BB holding 8d8c6s7s and the flop comes AhKhQh? Sometimes the best course of action is to donate as slowly as possible.

Such was the case for yours truly, brodoughno, and I limped it home in 31st spot. Daylight Saving Time was a stumbling block for BPT leader ViezeMan, costing him an hour's worth of blinds. This proved too much to overcome, and the resulting 57th place finish caused ViezeMan to "fall back" to third overall.

The versatile kufolem showed that he's no slouch at 8 Man Omaha PL, and backed up last week's win with a solid sixth place finish. He slipped past the sleeping ViezeMan into second position in the standings despite missing a BPT event. imjusthereforthebeer found the preverbial keg this time around and then laid under the tap. But upon being stopped, his point total indicated that he had gained just under the legal limit and $100 for the runner-up spot. imjusthereforthebeer now sits in fourth place overall and looks poised to pass the field sobriety test.

When the chips were down it was Freeroll26 who stepped up to the challenge and took down the $125 first prize. The winner also established a firm position in the BPT top ten. But the biggest move this week was made by the hostess with the mostest. Irongirl's dietary supplement boosted her point total to 617; enough to set the tour standard at the midway point in the season.

132 blogger hopefuls are trying to advance to the Dec. 23 Blogger Poker Tour Grand Final, where the top 20 will share in over $25,000 in prizes. The field is bunched tightly and only a 96 point spread separates 2nd and 8th, while the 200 point gap between 9th and 49th can be easily be erased in one event. After a week off, The House of Poker Blues will host BPT Event #5 on Nov. 18 at Poker.com. This weeks results and the updated standings:


Event #4 Omaha PL
1. Freeroll26 $125
2. imjusthereforthebeer $100
3. EgonOlsen $75
4. astinaguy $55
5. MTLdon $45
6. kufolem $30
7. Stevenslb159 $25
8. Rahaboss $20
9. PearlSnapMan $15
10. thepurdle $10


Overall Standings
1. Irongirl 617
2. kufolem 506
3. ViezeMan 501
4. imjusthereforthebeer 452
5. DawgRoyal 439
6. brodoughno 429
7. Freeroll26 416
8. natsdad 410
9. DavidMalek 374
10. elc3105 360

Freerolls For Sunday

01:00 AM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Sloppy Play FR
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15AM
04:00 AM $250 Bodog reg. 3AM
04:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15AM
06:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 5:15AM
08:00 AM $200 Riverbelle Poker reg. 7AM
08:15 AM €50 i4Poker reg. 5:15AM
08:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 7:15AM
10:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 9:15AM
10:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 9:15AM
11:00 AM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 10AM
12:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 11:15AM
12:15 PM €50 i4Poker reg. 11:15AM
12:45 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Stud Lover FR (7 Card)
01:00 PM $1000 Riverbelle Poker reg. 12PM
01:15 PM €700 i4Poker reg. 8AM
01:30 PM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30PM
02:00 PM $200 poker4ever reg. 12PM
02:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15PM
03:00 PM $10,000 Poker.com reg. 3AM
04:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Turned Striaight FR
04:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 3PM
04:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 03:15PM
04:15 PM €100 w/rebuys i4Poker reg. 3:15PM
06:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Buffalo Run FR
06:15 PM $50 OMAHA Poker.com reg. 5:15PM
08:00 PM $400 poker4ever reg. 6PM
08:15 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Dinner Roll FR
08:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 7:15PM
09:30 PM $1500 Bodog reg. 7:30PM
10:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Happy Hour FR
10:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 9PM
10:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 9:15PM
10:20 PM qualifier to $50 Canbet Poker reg. 9:20PM
12:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 11:15PM
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:15 AM TEC Ultimate Bet Poker reg. 1:45AM
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 1:15AM

Saturday Freerolls

01:00 AM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Sloppy Play FR
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:00 AM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15AM
04:00 AM $250 Bodog reg. 3AM
05:00 AM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
06:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 5:15AM
08:00 AM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
08:00 AM $200 Riverbelle Poker reg. 7AM
08:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 7:15AM
08:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 7:15AM
09:00 AM $2000 Carlos Poker reg. Friday
10:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 9:15AM *fills instantly
10:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 9:15AM
11:00 AM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 10AM
12:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 11:15AM *fills instantly
12:15 PM $50 i4Poker reg. 11:15AM
12:45 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Stud Lover FR (7 Card)
01:00 PM $200 Mermaid Poker reg. 10AM
01:00 PM $1000 Riverbelle Poker reg. 12PM
01:30 PM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30PM
02:00 PM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
02:00 PM $400 poker4ever reg. 12PM
02:15 PM $100 i4Poker reg. 12:15PM
02:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15PM *fills instantly
04:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Turned Striaight FR
04:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 3PM
04:00 PM $2,000 Poker.com reg. 03:55AM
04:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 03:15PM *fills instantly
04:15 PM $50 i4Poker reg. 3:15PM
05:00 PM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
06:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Buffalo Run FR
06:15 PM $50 OMAHA Poker.com reg. 5:10PM
07:00 PM $500 New Depositors Freeroll Poker.com
08:00 PM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
08:00 PM $400 poker4ever reg. 6PM
08:15 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Dinner Roll FR
08:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 7:15PM *fills instantly
09:30 PM $1500 Bodog reg. 7:30PM
10:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 9:15PM *fills instantly
10:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 9PM
10:20 PM qualifier to $50 Canbet Poker reg. 9:20PM
11:00 PM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
12:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 11:15PM *fills instantly
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:00 AM $50 New Player Freeroll Poker.com
02:15 AM TEC Ultimate Bet Poker reg. 1:45AM
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 1:15AM *fills quickly

Freeroll Listing: Weekdays

01:00 AM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Sloppy Play FR
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 1:15AM
04:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 03:15AM
04:00 AM $250 Bodog reg. 3AM
06:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 5:15AM
06:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 5:15AM
08:00 AM $200 Riverbelle Poker reg. 7AM
08:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 5:15AM
10:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 9:15AM
10:15 AM $50 i4Poker reg. 9:15AM
11:00 AM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 10AM
12:00 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 10:55AM *fills instantly
12:15 PM $50 i4Poker reg. 11:15AM
12:45 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Stud Lover FR (7 Card)
01:00 PM $200 Mermaid Poker reg. 10AM
01:00 PM $1000 Riverbelle Poker reg. 12PM
01:30 PM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30PM
02:00 PM $400 poker4ever reg. 12PM
02:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 01:15PM *fills instantly
04:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Turned Striaight FR
04:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 3PM
04:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 3:15PM
04:15 PM $100 i4Poker reg. 3:15PM
05:15 PM $500 DSI Poker **COUPON REQUIRED**
06:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Buffalo Run FR
06:15 PM $50 Omaha Poker.com reg. 5:15PM
06:15 PM $50 i4Poker reg. 5:15PM
08:00 PM $400 poker4ever reg. 6PM
08:15 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Dinner Roll FR
08:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 7:15PM
09:30 PM $1500 Bodog reg. 7:30PM
10:00 PM $50 Ultimate Bet Poker Happy Hour FR
10:00 PM $1000 Satellite Bowman's Poker reg. 9PM
10:15 PM $50 Poker.com reg. 09:15PM
10:20 PM qualifier to $50 Canbet Poker reg. 9:20PM
12:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 11:15PM
01:30 AM $20 Full Tilt Poker reg. 12:30AM
02:15 AM TEC Ultimate Bet Poker reg. 1:45AM
02:15 AM $50 Poker.com reg. 1:15AM